To a racing driver, who is used to slick tyres and fish-sharp reflexes, it’s wallowy and slithery and horrid. But to me it’s brilliant. Mostly because you can drive for more than 10 minutes without your head coming off. I also liked the styling, the ride — provided you stay out of the sport settings — the engine’s urgency, the fluidity of the responses and the elegance of the interior. Though, that said, this is not a car you can drive in cuff links. Because the centre console is set up for left-hand drive, every time you change gear your silver dog turd, or whatever, will hit the iDrive knob, which in extreme circumstances can cause the cabin to be filled with rap noises.

However, I’ve thought quite hard about this and can confidently say that the Z4, with its folding metal roof and softer feel, is now the best of the medium-sized sports cars. Certainly, I prefer it to the Boxster and the Mercedes SLK.

However, if it’s a real driving experience you want, forget the ultimate driving machine. Because, as I now realise, it isn’t.

The Clarksometer

The ultimate driving machine, or so I thought